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It’s the worst feeling in the world to love and hate someone all at the same time. And it’s hard to watch things change when all you want is for them to stay the same. It’s funny but stupid how you want everything and nothing at the same time. It’s crazy when you want to let go, but you keep holding on. And when you want to move on, but you’re stuck right where you started. When feelings come and go and you can’t decide what you want. When you have so many things to say but you don’t know where to start. When you want them in your life so bad, but all you can do is push them farther and farther away. It’s so hard to think back to how things used to be and look at it now and realize that things are different and they may never be the same. You tell yourself it’s not worth it, but if it really didn’t matter, you wouldn’t spend so much time thinking about it.  Do not look back and grieve over the past for it is gone, and do not be troubled about the future for it has not come. Live in the present and make it so beautiful that it will be worth remembering. Everyone says "well it's his loss", and as much as I want to believe them, I can't seem to grasp it. How is it his loss when I'm the one that's torn up, and I'm the one that has to deal with all the pain. Out of the both of us, I was the only one that lost something really important. If you really take a step back and look at it, he didn't loose me, he set me free. |
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